


Finding Grace

by Destina



Category: Kings
Genre: Futurefic, Multi, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-24
Updated: 2009-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-05 05:03:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/38088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Destina/pseuds/Destina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>David's soul has three parts, and without all three, he is incomplete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finding Grace

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Medie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Medie/gifts).



Like the kings of old, David finds he has inherited a palace full of mysteries and secrets. He has an instinctive loathing of unnecessary concealment; he scorns the fine art of deception. If those ways were the ones to follow, Jack would have been the right choice to rule; casting aside those lesser values in service to his king once gave David no small satisfaction.

Now they are useful only for one purpose.

"There are two banquets tomorrow," Michelle says, as she spreads the business of his kingdom before him on the grand oak table. Around its polished edges, politics have been conducted, treaties have been discussed, treason committed -- the course of many lives shaped. "The seating arrangements have been finalized. You should look them over, in case there's an error."

He puts his arm around his wife and kisses the top of her head, her hair as soft as butterfly wings against his cheek. "We have people who can keep track of all this, you know."

"That would deprive me of the pleasure of doing it for you." She smiles up at him, and he thinks how like and unlike her mother she is; strong and capable, polished and wise, and yet there isn't a destructive bone in her body. David dreads what twenty years of rule to come may write upon her character, what changes he'll see in her then. Not for the first time, he considers what twenty years of rule will do to him, even if he is aware and on his guard.

With both hands, he gathers up the loose papers and hands them back to her. "In the morning," he says, returning her smile with what he hopes is a hopeful expression. He lives his life now on the surface, composes his face before each word he speaks, and his body before every gesture. All the rest is locked beneath, away from scrutiny. Once in a while, he catches himself playing the role with Michelle, and drops those barriers. If he is to be the kind of ruler his people deserve, he can never hide from the ones who love him best.

"In the morning," she agrees. He kisses her, and wonders that she never seems to mind on those nights he parts from her, or question his word that it must be so.

Up the stairs in the dark, his bodyguards close behind, and then a detour to his son's room. Daniel sleeps sprawled out over his bed, half under and half outside of the covers, as if they are not able to contain him. Stars and planets cycle overhead until David clicks the night lamp off, and Daniel stirs, kicks his feet against the blankets. David smoothes the hair from his innocent face, and his son sleeps on, oblivious to his position in the world or the obligations to come.

From there, David climbs the second flight of stairs into the chambers he occupies alone. If any on his staff have questions, they wisely keep their curiosity to themselves. He thinks it's more than a lack of questioning; it's a grand conspiracy, not just for him, but for the boy they watched over as he grew up here. They saw him become confused, saw him rise and fall and be humbled. They know he became a wise and loyal man not through effort, but by experience. It is for Jack's sake they hold this silence, for love of him, and because they respect the king who never was.

When the door closes behind him, David sighs and lets the tension drop away from his shoulders. His kingdom is always with him, even in these tightly closed spaces; he can never be apart from the responsibility. This is something Silas was frank about, but David had no concept of those truths until the weight of Gilboa bore down on his spine and his conscience.

"Long day?" From the shadows, Jack's voice washes over David, leaving goosebumps across his skin.

"No more than usual." David divests himself of his tie and suit jacket and stands waiting.

This is their ritual. Not one of David's choosing, since it's never been his method to punish or demand, though he thinks he can see the seeds of those behaviors in himself after three years of kingship. Jack saunters to him, never fully obedient to anything but his own impulses and agenda, and kneels before David, head bowed. An offer; amends, apology, reconciliation, and every time is just like the first time.

In the beginning it was only desire that brought Jack to his door, David is sure. Back then, it was only desire that made David accept his overtures. But it's become more -- that same desire, but now warmed by need, and something that might be love, if David were much for the naming of things.

He puts his hand to the nape of Jack's neck and strokes his thumb across the bare skin there, down into the collar of Jack's loose white shirt. When Jack shivers beneath his touch, David goes to his knees and cradles Jack's face between his palms, takes in Jack's triumphant smirk even as he sees the vulnerability in Jack's eyes. He's out of practice at keeping things from David.

Even now, after this long together, they kiss as though they expect to be pulled apart any moment. Jack's kisses are deep and searching, and it's never enough to satisfy David. He craves the feel of Jack's skin, and Jack's touch on his body, wants it sometimes more than anything else in this world.

When he's with Michelle, he never thinks of Jack, and yet here with Jack, it's sometimes as if he's been granted a second life, one of peace and obscurity. There are many kinds of sin, but he finds grace in Jack's eyes, feels centered when Jack's mouth is on him, slow and tender.

He wonders that Jack finds it so easy when it was at first so difficult for David, but then Jack fits his body to David's, and David finds words eclipsed by mindless pleasure.

Tomorrow he will send Jack out to find and destroy the spies from Gath who dared to cross their borders. He will send his best and most loyal soldier out alone, not as a test but a mission of certainty. He twists beneath Jack and bites his shoulder, grins when Jack gasps and bites back, full of spiteful mischief. This joy is what he will deprive himself of, in service to his kingdom.

Jack's mission is a short-term absence, or so David tells himself. He never allows himself to imagine the day his commanders come to tell him Jack is lost to them. He never pictures himself alone in this space, absent a third of his soul.

Soon enough they twine together, spent, sheets bunched beneath them to make denial impossible. David holds Jack in his arms, content. For once Jack is quiet, not full of conversation or gossip, or advice on the business of their kingdom.

When he speaks, it is of course to give voice to both their fears, because Jack has always been a blunt instrument. "It's going to be dangerous, David. Ten to one I'll be—"

David delivers a bruising kiss, superstitious in his unwillingness to hear it said out loud. He flips them so Jack is beneath him, makes sure Jack sees his face. "God gave me to you, even when you couldn't see His plan," David says. "As He gave you to me as my instrument. It isn't His will you should die for me."

"What about your will?" Jack meets his gaze, so direct. The shadow of old mistrust falls across them.

In answer, David closes his eyes, presses his lips to the quick pulse at the side of Jack's throat. "I order you to stay alive," he says, low. "As my loyal subject, it's your duty to do exactly as your king commands."

Jack's eyes darken with understanding, and in return he kisses David slowly.

David takes it for a promise.

**Author's Note:**

> Yuletide treat! With a nod or two to the biblical source on which Kings is based. Many thanks to dotfic, innie_darling, and Teand for beta.


End file.
